The eyes can be deceiving. The person beholding an image will often perceive that which he sees in his mind rather than that what is in front of him. For example, one may look and me and see a freaky garden gnome or serial killer. This is untrue. I do not kill. I just cut off noses. And I am not a garden gnome.
Another example of this is someone looking at my work. Because my results give beauty which nature cannot match, him what has idea in his head of nose being bad if not looking like that which occurs in nature will see “botch” whereas others with more discerning eye will see beauty and craftsmanship.
I do not show prospective patients pictures of my own work, as they will often be shocked at how aesthetic my results are and because of this will sometimes mistake my results as being bad. They often feel my work is drastic as there has been so much improvement, when in really my work is actually very conservative (I do leave some of the original tissue in the nose).
Make sure you are not one of these slovenly public whose eyes deceive them! If you get rhinoplasty result that looks “botched” in your vision; ask your plastic surgeon for his opinion and he will tell you your result is good (which he will know better than you! Do not listen to unsavoury characters which feed you with other opinions! Him which created result is always much better judge than him which did not!).
It could also be that your result is good, but you just need the rest of your face manipulated to fit your new nose. In this case, always ask opinion of plastic surgeon for what to sculpt your face into more aesthetic shape for a more aesthetic look.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
"Natural" vs. Unnatural
Sometimes patients come to me and complain of result to be not what they like. Always they complain of not looking "natural"; I tell them, "nature ugly, why you come to me for perform rhinoplasty then?". Surgery can only improve unsightly nose, the more surgery performed on nose the more aesthetic the nose will look.
I have very troublesome patient come to me and tell me nose not look good. I very shocked and surprised; new nose is finely sculpted with tip so pointy could open envelope. Who could be dissatisfied with such a thing? Also complaining he was about irregularity of nose, I tell him "irregularity of nose wonderful thing! do you not want nose multi-faceted like diamond?". He not like asymmetry of nose, but his face is asymmetric so I made nose more asymmetric to fit with face. Is not to have matching face and nose splendid and aesthetic thing?
He get very threatening and agressive, when leave he slam door causing damage to door, even damage to building (he even slam door so hard he create cracks in walls of dirty old house I consult from that were already there!).
Later he complain to medical board, but I use persuasion to other plastic surgeon to not testify against me. Are we not all genius? Should one who has risen to godlike status of plastic surgeon be dropped to masses of great unwashed?
Eventually, medical board agree with me that "open roof deformity" not a deformity! Of course this is known to those with wisdom. Lots of money westerners pay for cars with open roofs, yet they not want open roof on nose? Ridiculous is such a thing.
Here in instruction on protection against patient:
1. Simply tell medical board you have done actions all complying with "standard practice". While some may say it is an unethical thing to lie to medical board, this is only said by those not imparted with higher wisdom of plastic surgeon.
2. Never admit you wrong. Because you not wrong! Even wrong you are, then you are right because you are plastic surgeon! Every nose will look better after operation, and this should be known.
3. Never, ever give refund to patient. Even if patient die. If you lose money, you lose power; and it is well known that women are attracted to money and power. How you expect prostitute to show any interest then?
Follow these steps, and then you will be able to create stupendous deformed nose they rest of life.
I have very troublesome patient come to me and tell me nose not look good. I very shocked and surprised; new nose is finely sculpted with tip so pointy could open envelope. Who could be dissatisfied with such a thing? Also complaining he was about irregularity of nose, I tell him "irregularity of nose wonderful thing! do you not want nose multi-faceted like diamond?". He not like asymmetry of nose, but his face is asymmetric so I made nose more asymmetric to fit with face. Is not to have matching face and nose splendid and aesthetic thing?
He get very threatening and agressive, when leave he slam door causing damage to door, even damage to building (he even slam door so hard he create cracks in walls of dirty old house I consult from that were already there!).
Later he complain to medical board, but I use persuasion to other plastic surgeon to not testify against me. Are we not all genius? Should one who has risen to godlike status of plastic surgeon be dropped to masses of great unwashed?
Eventually, medical board agree with me that "open roof deformity" not a deformity! Of course this is known to those with wisdom. Lots of money westerners pay for cars with open roofs, yet they not want open roof on nose? Ridiculous is such a thing.
Here in instruction on protection against patient:
1. Simply tell medical board you have done actions all complying with "standard practice". While some may say it is an unethical thing to lie to medical board, this is only said by those not imparted with higher wisdom of plastic surgeon.
2. Never admit you wrong. Because you not wrong! Even wrong you are, then you are right because you are plastic surgeon! Every nose will look better after operation, and this should be known.
3. Never, ever give refund to patient. Even if patient die. If you lose money, you lose power; and it is well known that women are attracted to money and power. How you expect prostitute to show any interest then?
Follow these steps, and then you will be able to create stupendous deformed nose they rest of life.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Eighth Wonder of World - nose of La Toya!
Today I will be looking at wondrous marvel of modern medicine... nose of La Toya Jackson. What a thing of wondrous beauty. Even master plastic surgeon like myself still marvel at work of master craftsman who manage to create finely sculpted aesthetic nose of beauty.
Look at lovely aesthetic taper of nose. Gaze in awe at the way nostrils retract so far you can almost see interior of nasal cavity of La Toya. It is a wonder to behold.
This is ideal nose, and what I aim for with every surgery.
Unfortunately, stupidity of medical regulations means one cannot perform that which will be most aesthetic result; but one such as I can always come close with removing as much material from nose as regulation will allow. See how beautiful nose of Ms Jackson is only septum? Other cartilage and bone not necessary in construction of beautiful nose. Would be far better if surgeon could remove all of nose except septum. Chop, chop, chop! But only allowed to do so much. Still always endeavour to remove as much unsightly bone and cartilage as possible.
Look at lovely aesthetic taper of nose. Gaze in awe at the way nostrils retract so far you can almost see interior of nasal cavity of La Toya. It is a wonder to behold.
This is ideal nose, and what I aim for with every surgery.
Unfortunately, stupidity of medical regulations means one cannot perform that which will be most aesthetic result; but one such as I can always come close with removing as much material from nose as regulation will allow. See how beautiful nose of Ms Jackson is only septum? Other cartilage and bone not necessary in construction of beautiful nose. Would be far better if surgeon could remove all of nose except septum. Chop, chop, chop! But only allowed to do so much. Still always endeavour to remove as much unsightly bone and cartilage as possible.
Defending of wondrous fellow surgeon against LIES!
Here, I must take opportunity to defend highly well regarded surgeon Ellenbogen - some claim he evil, but look! Here: http://richardellenbogenruinedmynose.blogspot.com/2008_11_01_archive.html . Make lovely aesthetic nose for patient! Ungrateful is patient for spreading such impertinent lies. Now, when you see wondrous results of Ellenbogen and lies of malice spread by ungrateful patient, you know why all lies spread by patients of Dam are FALSE!
Even medical board agree Barrell Dam wondrous surgeon - though did have to lie to board in investigations, was only to protect wonderful godlike surgery of great Dam. If medical board stop me from operating on patient, who would give them aesthetic mangled nose? I know of not any!
Come to Barrell Dam and you get good result just like ones seen in vexing blog above!
Even medical board agree Barrell Dam wondrous surgeon - though did have to lie to board in investigations, was only to protect wonderful godlike surgery of great Dam. If medical board stop me from operating on patient, who would give them aesthetic mangled nose? I know of not any!
Come to Barrell Dam and you get good result just like ones seen in vexing blog above!
Monday, July 12, 2010
Welcome to my lovely aesthetic blog!
Hello, my name is Barrell Dam. I am world renown Plastic Surgeon - warrant for my arrest in many countries! Some may say I not good surgeon because they not like lovely aesthetic surgery I do for them - they stupid! My rhinoplasty make lovely beautiful thin, sculpted crooked nose - very aesthetic! Not like ugly wide "natural" nose like patient want. My patients complain because their nostril uneven - who want even nostril like everybody else? Better to have one nostril small and beautiful for looking at and have one large nostril for breathe.
Also, I perform breast augmentation - make make splendid big fake titties on womens! I also like this procedure as I get to touch breast of nubile young girls! I not get to touch much titty in real life as I ugly creepy haggard old man; but as Plastic Surgeon get to feel up bosoms of many girls, so I very happy!
This blog is for purposes of making dispel unsavoury rumour about me being not good surgeon - all lies! They not know that I more better than god? We shall see. Glorious power of Dam triumph in end.
Also, I perform breast augmentation - make make splendid big fake titties on womens! I also like this procedure as I get to touch breast of nubile young girls! I not get to touch much titty in real life as I ugly creepy haggard old man; but as Plastic Surgeon get to feel up bosoms of many girls, so I very happy!
This blog is for purposes of making dispel unsavoury rumour about me being not good surgeon - all lies! They not know that I more better than god? We shall see. Glorious power of Dam triumph in end.
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